One day a young gentleman was walking down the street. He sees a wounded dog laying there on the sidewalk. He goes to tend to the wounded animal. It bites his hand. He rushes to the hospital and tests positive for rabies. The man has to be vaccinated and the dog terminated.

Q: What did the homless man get for chritsmas? A: Frostbite

What did the frat guy drink after he lifted? A various assortment of beverages that were chilled at a cool 66 degrees.

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a tree There isn't a tree in my garage

Yes

As we had been trying for some months now, I called my wife to ask her the result of her pregnancy test. A stranger answered and promptly told me she was killed in a car crash.

Why did the pedophile cross the road? To molest a child.

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks the duck "What'll it be?" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck and it can't talk.

What's upside down? umop apisdn

Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinsons..

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Enough.

Why did the chick cross the road? To get to the brothel for hot lesbian love.

roses are red. violetss are black. a knife would go good in your back

Why did the blonde run into a screen door? Because screen doors are difficult to see when one is running at full speed

Who let the dogs out? The dog's owner.

What is sad and disappointing? Nevada's and California's snow pack.

A man asks his wife to make him a sandwich, she proceeds to make a sandwich using rye bread, lettuce, two slices of tomatoes, a variety condiments, mustard and several slices of American cheese. The man eats the sandwich at a parade with his wife celebrating Woman's Rights.

When you see birds flying in a V why is one side of the V always longer than the other? There are more birds on that side

Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

Why was Chris crying? There was a robbery at his house and both of his parents were brutally murdered.

What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

The people who posted those extremely long "jokes" down there have no life.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse then says nothing because horses cannot talk, only humans can talk.

What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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