The funniest thing happened in my dream last night, i dreamed that banks would stop ripping people off and start treating people like humans. How wierd is that :D

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Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

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Roses are red Violets are blue I tryed to hang myself But my neck qad to fat

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hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

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why did the 42 inch plasma screen blow-up 6 hours before the england match ? because it knows .

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Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A: Cheese.

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The last head of Satan, is oh but what you blamed upon Your faults, Your sins. The thoughts of Madness written here, yet potent enough to cloud Your thoughts.... Wait not forever children of man, as eternity is at its peak, the false prophet IS AMONGST US! But what side is he on? The last ditch attempt to protect humanity from a raging jealous vengeful God? Say it is not so! Say that darkness is not the only thing standing against you and eternal damnation... ...Yet you killed his only true child, you stole his name, his essence... Even his Identity... ...Even the Angels white are powerless to stop him, Your maker, Your true maker, for what is the grief of the holy, from which you took his only son... ...As you celebrate once and once anew... :...Merry CHRISTmas, to all of those of you all now left behind... Celebrate it well, as before the world reaches 2017, is where it all ends...

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My grandfather died in a concentration camp. He fell off a guard tower and broke his neck.

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Have you heard of the Armenian genocide? No? Me neither.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Dog Dog wh- wait how did you knock? *mindblown*

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What's more absurd than a goldfish astronaut? A jew that cares about palestinians

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Why didn't gram-pa give his grandson a Birthday present? Because he had Alzheimer's and forgot about him.

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Q: A man walked into a bar and said, "Ouch!" Why? A: The man walked into a METAL bar.

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Denard Robinson

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

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This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

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WHAT DOES A NUMBER DO WHEN IT'S HORNE? MATHDERBATION

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Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

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What did the hand say to the face? Nothing because body parts cannot speak.

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Wat did the man say to the other man when they were alone. We dont know. They were alone.

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How did the boy fall off the swing? He got hit by a fridge

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how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops