What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

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A man walks into a bar. Since he was only moving at a slow walking pace, he was fine, no further events worth noting occured.

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An Asian couple walks into a bar, orders a few drinks, pays, and leaves

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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All of these jokes suck; so I just made one that equally sucks!

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How did the seal die? It went clubbing ... Then overdosed on ecstasy, it was very sad.

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Roses are red, My name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van

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Chuck Norris was so good at karate that he held the middle weight world title for 6 years and was named fighter of the year by Black Belt Magazine. He also used his talents to start a successful acting and advertising career.

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two guys r talking and the one said *i swear to god* and the other one said *u swear what to god what the hell r u talking about i dont even know u*

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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How do you get a blonde to eat crayons? Threaten to kill her parents with a hacksaw.

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How do you make a clown shut up? Throw a axe at it!!

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cory is gay

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What's worse than failing a school test for Peter? Nothing, because he is asian.

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Ps: Its "Cain" again, just for matters of security here, how did he install power wires under the basement? How are you even able to use your computer over there?

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your Grandmother died.

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Your mom is so retard that she needs "special help" from medical professionals. :3 <33

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What do you call a black guy in a Walmart? A customer. You prejudice dullard!

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A man travels to the park, and kills a person, throws them in a bag and runs away. He then travels to the grocery store, kills 2 people, throws them in a bag and walks away. He then travels to the gas station, kills 3 people and walks away. He keeps traveling around killing people until he has claimed 69 victims in all. From this, we can infer that he was a psychotic murderer with a perverted sense of humor.

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What grows best during the cold Winter season? The number of deaths among homeless people.

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

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What is green and red and flies 100 miles an hour? Super Frog.

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Why did the man answer his cell phone at 3 AM in the morning? Because his phone was ringing and was probably waiting for an important phone call

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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