Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

your momma so stupid she dropped out of high school

What do you call a popular rap and hip-hop artist? Tunde

How do you make a nerd cry? Give him a 99% on a test.

What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

What do you call a black priest? Father, and then whatever his name happens to be.

Knock Knock Who's there? The Police. Come out with your hands up!

what happens when chuck norris loses his hokey-bar? your mother

ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ now I know my ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ no I know my ABC etc:

What's worse than falling out of a tree and landing on a dog? Rape.

What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels.

Why can't you borrow money from a leprechaun? Because leprechauns don't exist.

whats worse than 2 jews 3 jews

How do you put 100 kids on a girls face ? skeet

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!

What did the cop say to the speeding black man? "Can I see your license and registration?"

If a train leaves Chicago at 50 miles per hour, how hard does the baby strapped to the tracks get splattered?

Why didn't the man get into Harvard? Because he had bad grades

how do you wake up a really old man? you dont, he's probably already dead.

How do you make a lawyer cry? You can't. The production of tears requires a soul, which, regretfully, no lawyer possesses.

Know what im sayin'? No but im wearing pants

How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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