What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? one's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, the other is a lawyer

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because its rayseans favorite number

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Q: What do you get when you have water, sodium C14-16 olefin sulfonate, glycerin, disodium lauroamphodiacetate, polysorbate 20, cocamidopropyl, betaine, PEG-6 Phenoxyethanol, PPG-15 Stearyl, Ether, Citric Acid, isocateth-20, Fragrance, Methylparaben, Tetrasodium EDTA, Xanthan Gum, Propylparben, Ethylparagen, and Camelia Sinensis Leaf Extract? A: All New Clean & Clear Oil Free Make-up Dissolving Foaming Cleanser.

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What did the rapist say to the child? Contrary to popular belief, I am just a kind old man that likes to hand out sweets to disadvantaged young children. I only got dubbed a rapist when a child crawled into the back of my van as I drove off; the fact that his abusive father was the one who raped him is not my fault.

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What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? El-if-iknow

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

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What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

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Why was the boy sad? Because a freak accident killed his mum his dad his best friend and he lost both his legs and is unable to feed himself

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What's worst then a road kill? Multiple road kils.

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whats worse than getting lost in europe? becoming the middle in the human centipede.

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My uncle got hit by a truck, what was the last thing to go through his mind? The drive shaft.

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there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

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*Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Would you mind turning your music down a bit please? I have reports to write."

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Why was the boy afraid? Because he had just seen his dog get ran over by a tractor

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What is the difference between a trampoline and a baby? You take your boots of before jumping on the trampoline!!!!!!!!!

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What do you call a mexican man with a rubber toe? Ruberto.

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Why couldn't the black guy support his family? He was only 3 years old.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witnesses, can we have a moment of your time?

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Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

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Yes

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If these walls could talk - the public would pay large sums of money to see this marvel of science. On a more serious note, they might also tell the cops about the many dead hookers stowed within them.

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What did the bank clerk say to the robber when he demanded all the money in the drawer? "Okay."

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What's worse than 6 dead babies in a trash can? More than 6.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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