So I have an idea that will solve both world population and hunger problems! I call it the Omni-Abortion law. The idea is that all babies must be aborted and then eaten. Progressive, right?

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Why did the man walk into the wall? He was blind.

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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star wars kid

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How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

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What did the single woman get for Christmas? Raped.

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A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

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I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. But it wasn't actually getting bigger, it was just getting closer. So I got hit in the face.

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Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

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CALLER: Is your refrigerator running? OWNER: Yes, it's working just fine.

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Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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You Scream, I Scream, The cops come, It's awkward

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Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack has a crippling addiction to Cocaine which ultimately led to his divorce and the subsequent loss of custody of his children.

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- Why does a kid from Chernobyl have two heads? - Because of the effects of the nuclear disaster that occurred there in 1986.

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Why wouldn't joey pay attention in class? Because he was being raped by a grizzly bear.

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Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

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Why did the black man scream in church? He felt like it.

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do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

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What the difference between a black person and a piece of shit in a bucket? The bucket

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her with a knife.

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What did John name his dog? Doggy

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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Why did the man not get his licence He was blind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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