A man walks into a doctor's office and says "Doctor, it hurts when I poke my leg like this!" The doctor replies "That because there's a knife in your hand."

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Roses are red Violets are purple. I just realized that nothing rhymes with "Purple".

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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whats short blonde and speaks spanish? my spanish teacher Mrs. Inman

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what do you do after throwing a water bottle in the trash? Hug a tree

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Why was the dentist sent to jail? Because he committed a crime.

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If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, what does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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Are tomatoes more scary than onions? No. They are not more scary than onions.

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A man walks into a bar, drinks, then leaves the bar.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Me either. Well, later. Later.

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A: That's a catchy song! B: You know what else is catchy? A: What? :) B: Herpes. Awkward silence.

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen A submarine you pervert

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A black guy, a Mexican, an Arab and a white guy walk into a room and embrace cultural diversity.

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two men write a poem one says quack the other says woof what is the middle of the number witch is amazing because who ever is reading this you are beautiful and have chucken food ion your cheek bone connected to the knee cap indeed i shall write on to you guys saying how lovley it is TO MAKE FIRENDS WITH CHICKENS

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple Finding 2 worms in your apple

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Two kids are playing basketball. One says to the other, "FAILMUFFIN!" The basketball flies out of bounds.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your bipolar aunt so don't ask again.

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An Asian walks into a bar with his girlfriend He proceeds to buy himself and her food Pays Then leaves

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ERROR 3045: This joke has gone bankrupt and Is laying in the hospital//:: THE CAUSE: OBAMA CARE

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Whats black and red and dead? Nobody could tell, but they were sure that it wasn't a dead black person, so stop being racist!

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Me: Knock Knock Mom: Who's there? Me: Jason Mom: Jason who Jason: HOW COULD YOU FORGET ME I CAN'T BELRIVE YOUR ALZHEIMER'S HAS GOTTEN THAT BAD! WHY DOES THIS HAPPEN TO ME BWAAA! *Jason sadly died short after from a bus hitting him*

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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A man didn't feel well so he went to the toilet. He had explosive diahrria, then felt better.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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