What did the German girl say to me? entschuldigen Sie (excuse me)

lets work together to make all racists jokes in negitives

an object in motion continues to stay in motion unless acted upon by an external force :)

In America you read books, but in Soviet Russia, it's exactly the same as it is in America, because it's not possible for books to read humans.

what do you get when you cross a baby and a car a baby shaped dent, and a dead baby

An American, a Canadian, an Afro-American and a Jew walk in a bar. They all order their favorite drink and go look for potential partners with whom they'd wish to engage in sexual relationships.

What is funny about civil and women's rights? Nothing, they are very serious matters.

A Jewish boy walks up to his father and says: Dad, can I borrow 50 dollars? The dad responds: 40 dollars?!? What are you going to do with 30 dollars?!?

What's worse than falling out of a tree and landing on a dog? Rape.

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

What do you call 50 jewish, homeless men peeing into a river? Pollution.

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

would you rather harry styles my dick have harry styles suck my dick or both of you style on my harry dick?

If you have a stroke, call 000

A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

How many chickens did Moses bring to the ark? 2

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor Wheres my tractor?

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack" Ducks don't talk. But if it were to say something it would probably mention how it is concerned about the fact that the majority of people on the internet don't know what ducks say to each other.

roses are red violets are blue kyle brown and pj nosaki have big balls

What does an Eagle and a Mole have in common? The are both of the kingdom Animalia, possessing many organ systems and cellular similarities. And they both live underground. Except for the Eagle.

Why did the cow fall Cause a fat kid pushed him over

Two Iranian men walk into a bar and order a Coke and a Lemonade. The Barman said take a seat and he'll bring them over.

Like this if you want people to stop asking to have their jokes liked.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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