- Anti Joke

Look down at your keyboard. Notice that U and I are together? <3 Also notice that J and K are together too!:P

Parents who drive with children on their lap should be wrapped with a huge diapper

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

Why is Michael J. Fox so go at dance? Because he took lesson as a child

Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You get the census of income per citizen and see who is at the top.

When life gives you lemons, refrigerate them so they don't go bad.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

Why did the blonde run into a screen door? Because screen doors are difficult to see when one is running at full speed

a penguin biked to a bakery he walked in and asked for buns the baker said how many 12 or 13 the penguin said it don't matter I brought my bike

What do Ethiopians do on Fridays? Starve.

One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

Knock Knock. Erm, sorry to be weird, but can you perhaps use the doorbell, because it's new and has a novelty chime. I'm proud of it and get a little chuckle everytime it rings in the vain hope that, perhaps you, the visitor, may also find it entertaining. Who's there anyway?'

A man walks into his cubicle and sits down. After a long day of work, he goes home and happens to die whilst eating dinner.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Chickens are not smart enough to open a gate and avoid traffic at the same time!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why did the chicken cross the road? His family was being held hostage on the other side.

What's Hitler's favorite drink? Jews (meaning juice)

why did the child kill his mother because the child gave his mom AIDS

why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black person on a bike? Its probably your bike.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

Do you like fish sticks? Yes. Me too.

Adam is gay tom is here that's nice