How do you have safe sex? Cut your own balls off

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If I have $5 and Chuck Norris has $5, we both have the same monetary value.

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What's brown and sticky? ...poop....and refried beans

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Binladen coming to a beach near you :D

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Why did the doctor wear glasses? Because he was a whale.

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Q. How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A. Lets go ride bikes

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Guy 1 : what you watching? Guy 2 : a documentary on birds Guy 1 : can i watch it with you? Guy 2 : yeah sure go for it.....

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens' rights.

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What is the difference between Whitney Houston and Elvis. They are dead. And it make people go boo hoo

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What do you expect from a perverted demon? -nothing less perverted!

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Like Harry Potter? Like anti-jokes? Check these out: http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38139-why-did-dumbledore-fall-off-the-astronomy-tower-because-snape-killed-him http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38140-knock-knock-who-s-there-you-know-you-know-who-call-him-voldemort-fear-of-a-name-increases-fear-of-the http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38141-a-black-kid-an-asian-kid-and-a-jewish-kid-walk-into-a-barrier-they-are-students-at-hogwarts-school

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A man walks into a bar... and gets hurt.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your watch? About 3:26 PM Eastern Standard Time.

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What's worse than heartbreak? Getting run over by a steamroller.

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Q: What happened when Timmy divided by zero? A: He got a syntax error.

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Whats funnier than a pile of dead babies? A young girl you know personally, completely alone with leukemia.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a finger And the middle ones for you

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How did the man rob the bank? With a gun

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Why did the baby stop crying? Mommy shook him.

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Why didn't the black man finish high school? He overdosed on heroin.

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*Look Down* Nice shoes, wanna F@#k?

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Why did the hooker go to the bathroom? Because she just exchanged sex for money and was cleaning herself up for her next trick.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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Two men walk into a bar. Seeing as the first man could have suffered a concussion, and been seriously hurt, The second man ducks to avoid also being hit by the bar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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