An Indian, American and French man walk into the bar simultaneously. Unfortunately, they get stuck in the door.

-Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? -She had no arms. -Knock, knock. Who's there? -Not Sally.

Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

What did one computer say to the other? 01001111 01100010 01110110 01101001 01101111 01110101 01110011 0100000 01100010 01101001 01101110 01100001 01110010 01111001 0100000 01101001 01110011 0100000 01101111 01100010 01110110 01101001 01101111 01110101 01110011

What do tigers dream of when they take a tiger snooze? Mike Tyson

Why do so many black athletes drive black cadillac escalades? Because it's roomy and they deserve to reward themselves after they put in so much hard work trying to be the best player they can be.

A Jew walked into a bar and his cat died of aids

Why was little georgia afraid of the tea cup ? Because she was tripping over the holocaust.

A man walks into a sofa. BANG

Women outside of the kitchen.

Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

What do you a call a black man in a two piece suit? A respectable citizen, racial profiling is ignorant.

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its babies were being mauled by a cat.

Why did Suzie die? She ate too many fried twinkies.

What did the White guy say to the balck guy? "How are you?"

Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

Why did the man have no head? It was blown off in Iraq 2 and days ago

What's a green tasty vegetable? None, they're vegetables.

Why won't Santa be delivering presents this year? Because he can't be bothered.

A woman walked into a college.....which wasn't suprising because she never learned to read

What do you get when you cross a chicken and a dinosaur? You can't. Dinosaurs are extinct.

guest who else is a ugly bitch my mom

Whats so funny about the women bringing fast food home for her family? Nothing shes a single mother who does'nt have time to make food between her two jobs.

Red are roses Blue are violets Dyslexic am I.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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