Two men walked into a bar. Only one came out. What happened? One Passed out.

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What's blue and smells like red paint Blue paint.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why did the cops beat up rodney king? Resisting arrest.

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What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Awwww sheeeeeeet!

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

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What's worst then finding a worm in your apple Eating it.

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What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

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Yo mama's chest is so flat that it's because she has stage five breast cancer and had to get both her breasts removed.

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Whats long, hard, and makes a girl excited? A penis.

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Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

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A Jew walks into a bar...He uses his coupon to get a free drink, then leaves.

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What do you call an anti joke that's not funny? Non-existent.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I chucked a shit and flushed the toilet.

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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What's worse than sitting through a boring class? Sitting on a bus that a terrorist is about to blow up.

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What do you say when you accidently punch a wasps nest? Nothing.The correct choice is ton run as fast as you can to avoid getting stung by the entire nest of wasps.

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Why did the black man jump off of a bridge? -He was in depression and comitted suicide.

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What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

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What's plastic and kids turn it on... A xbox.

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NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

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Why did the Iraqi cross the road? Because he was hired by the CIA as an undercover operative to lead them to a highly dangerous target in the small town of Aziziyah and was leaving the area to avoid the impending Pavelow strike on the town center.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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