why did the chicken cross the road? it was making its way home after a long day of luckless job interviews

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What did the zero say to the eight? I don't know,numbers are inanimate objects so they can't talk.God, what did you think?

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What do you call a quadriplegic man at a museum? "Sir," unless you happen to know his given name, in which case it would be most polite to call him that.

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- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

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what did Shivank say to Ricky? "you suck dick" HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

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roses are red violets are blue i have five fingers the middle ones for you

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There are two jews in an oven. One says "It sure is hot in here" and the other says "AHH A TALKING JEW"

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What is lazy? My balls. All they do is hang.

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Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

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I insist, you go ahead. See you around. how about in four six hours?

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Seriously, I am going to tell you, but you know, what would you have preferred that it was if you could choose, I am kinda insecure about these things, and people can read these messages so...

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what did the little girl with cancer get for christmas? cancer

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whats white and smells like onions? an onion..

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Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing, you should call a local animal rescue number and care to its needs.

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Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

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When SCUBA diving, why is it important to fall backward off the side of the boat? Because if you fell forward, you would still be in the boat.

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What did God say when he made his first black guy? Oh no I burned one! :)

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What's the difference between a duck?

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what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, That's what they tell me because I'm blind.

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Why did the rose look so brown? Because it was dead

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Why are there no Jews in hell? Because Hitler is there,

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops