Yo mama so ugly that she often has trouble being attractive towards people of the opposite gender

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's long and hard and full of semen? An erect penis at the climax of an orgasm.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

a brunet,a redhead,and a blone were stranded on an island 4 miles away from land. the brunet swam 1 mile and drowned. the redhead swam 2 and drowned. the blond swam 3 miles and decided to swim 3 miles back to the island

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Did you hear Whitney Houston died? Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

roses are red, violets are blue, dandelions are yellow, tulips are pink, sunflowers are black and yellow, my dick is 13 inches long.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the Muslim boy crash a plane into a building? Because the remote-controlled plane suddenly malfuctioned and crashed into a nearby apartment complex.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? I don't hammer the watermon

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Lady gaga suposedly has a wener.What does that make her? A man

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why was the Muslim crying? Because his brother got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to prom. First he goes to get a tux but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he hast to get some flowers so he goes to a florist and there is a huge flower line there. It takes forever but he gets the flowers. Next he heads to get a limo, unfortunately there is a long limo line at the rental office and it takes a long time but he gets the job done. Finally the day of the prom comes and the two are dancing happily and are having a good time. When the song is over she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there is no punchline.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Q: Why is daddy wrestling mommy? A: Well Jimmy, that is called sexual intercourse. That is how you were created, and many people of all ages engage in this activity every second.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

what has four legs but cant walk? a dog after anal

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How did the fat guy survive the air crash? He was he was astronomically and improbably lucky.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A man walks into a bar and wakes up in the hospital with a mild concussion.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

An old man walks into a bar. It was, a metal cylinder, not unlike a short carbon rod, and not the drinking establishment he normally frequents, named O'Malley's Pub and Eatery, which was, in fact, next to the the building with the protruding metal bar. He suffered greater injury than a younger man due to his advanced age and deteriorating health. But he did eventually recover by strictly adhering to his doctor's advice of bed rest, improved diet, and increased, yet moderate, aerobic exercise.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why are you a chicken? Because I say cock-a-doodle doo

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do you get when you skin a potato? A screaming kid with autism and no skin.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

There once was a man from Nantucket. He was a good, New England family man

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did the Christian say to the Muslim. Nothing. He understood his right to have a opinion even if his religion is against it.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did the Watermelon say to its baby? I'll SEED you later!

thumb_up thumb_down -27

what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the eskimo drag the seal into the igloo? Because the whale wouldn't fit.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

why was the boys t.v broken? because he through it out the window

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops