Why did the man go to space? He was a highly trained astronaut

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a skank.

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What did the policeman say to the man accused of murder? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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how do you wash clothes in the diswasher? you turn it on.

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Jews for Jesus

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Why don't chickens where pants? Cause they're animals,duh.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs wearing lead weights in a pool? Screwed.

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why did the chicken cross the road? cause it can bitch.

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What do yo call SQUIRAL!!!!

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knock knock. who's there greench greench who greenchicken feathers

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Why couldn't Peter climb the tree? Because he's a fish.

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why did the chicken cross the road? who knows, we cannot read an animals (or a human for that matter) mind. Perhaps, though unlikely as he's a chicken, he saw a friend across the road or a child who wants to stroke him. Perhaps he is trying to escape being used as a circus act or being cooked for a supermarket. We cannot complain if the chicken wishes for a better life. Anyway, we shall never know why the chicken decided to cross the road, and never will, as it is dead after being hit by a car.

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Nickelback

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what do you call a fish with no gills? I dont know what youd call that creature...but its no fish.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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Why did the guy throw a clock out of his window? Because he had mental issues.

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Why wasn't the woman in the kitchen? Because she was in the living room.

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whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

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What's the difference between a baby and cheese? I don't like cheese in my sandwiches.

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What did the blonde do when she found out one is most likely to get in a car accident within 6 miles of the home? She drove more carefully in her neighborhood.

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A African man and Hispanic man fall off of a cliff, which hits the ground first? They both hit the ground simultaneously, due to their equal mass and surface area.

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what did the ninja say to the watermelon ? nothing

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman

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A guy walks into a bar, and then orders a jack and coke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops