Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the father leave work early on his son's birthday? He was rushed to the hospital after facing a severe heart attack due to a history of cardiovascular disease in his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

speak now or forever hold your pee

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? You don't, he just jumps down.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a Mexican flying a plane? A pilot

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a man with a Club approaching a Seal Very Strong considering he can hold a building

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What is little,red and its in the corner??? -strawberry in the corner

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Technically rainbows are white.....and have gold at the end.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A man walks into a bar He says "ow" and promptly sits down and ices the bruise he sustained

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A man walks into a bar at 4:00 PM NO it was actually 4:01 because my clock is messed up and My dad likes cheese plus pie

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the kid tell his father? Go away, I'm watching elmo!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a blonde who passed the SAT's? An excellent student.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How did the man want his hair cut? In silence.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why are black people black? Because they're clearly not white.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Who loves George Clooney? George Clooney

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

thumb_up thumb_down -3

the anti-joke.com joke was just like a normal joke. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q; what did the gangster say after he and his gang robbed a bank? A;Hey boys lets go drink some soy milk (After that his gang killed him) but the moral of the story is to not rob banks or take drugs

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Once upon a time, your dog got hit by a car this morning

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats white and sticky? Glue.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Unfortunate

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops