Knock Knock, Who's there? The Postman. But I wasn't expecting a parcel. Is it for 37? No, Sorry, its for 35.

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A rapist walks into a bar. He is promptly arrested afterwards.

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call me maybe.

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why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was taped to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? it didn't

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A man walks into a bard with a politician, an Asian man, and a sailor. They all get drinks and have a good time.

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Guess what Timmy got for Christmas, Nothing, Timmy has no parents, he's an orphan.

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At the Asthma hotline. Caller: Aahhh aahhh *gasp* *gasp* I need you... Woman: *slams phone* DAMN I WISH THESE PERVERTS WOULD STOP CALLING!

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What did the old women do when she found her husband dead? She had a heart attack and died as well.

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There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

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why did the man have a hole in his face? because syphillis had eaten a hole in it

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Bob Saget that is all

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A little boy who was sleeping in his parents' bed woke up in the middle of the night only to discover his mother performing fellatio on his father. "Mommy, mommy," he said . . . except he didn't -- he said nothing, and the incident troubled him for many years.

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knock knock... ...no answer

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What's the difference between a bird and a wheel? They both fly, I lied about the wheel.

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Q:why is steven balmont gonna beat up mr fatty goral A:because hes a fat czech Shout out to my mandem lewis hall&moses

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knock knock, whos there, isaac touch my titty

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Q:What business did the black man break into? A: The business of show, because he was a talented actor.

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I like food. But what's more than that it is necessary for survival. ASIAN!!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I forgot.

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why did the boat float up to the sky? because everybody on it died including the boat...

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why is andreas making a pizza? since he dosent get laid he likes the feeling of the sauce stinging on his dick

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A blonde walks into a bar, and hit it head on, she is now in the hospital grasping for her life but the threatening grips of hell keep pulling her into the wretched plains of fiery wrath and despair... -Avery Vartanian

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How do you stop the neighbors from calling the police when you play your music too loud? Kill them and use their bodies as noise insulation

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What did the frog say to the other frog Your a chode

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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