Q: What happens when eight men throw purple at a rain coat? A: Mud-flaps, because electricity can't power a vagina.

There were three guy's caught trespassing on a farmers land. The farmer said he wont kill them if they did what they were told, he told everyone to pick one fruit. The 1st guy came to him with grapes. The farmer told him to shove it up his butt so he did, the 2nd guy came to the farmer with orange, the farmer told him to shove them up his butt but the guy kept laughing, the farmer got angry and snapped whats so funny? My buddy over over there is picking watermelons.

What do you call a half man half manatee? A manatee

Donald trump walks into the whitehouse. He's there for a business meeting with the new president.

Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

Three baby seals walk into a club...

Sir, do you know what time it is? Yes, it is 5:15 PM

what do u call a gay guy? Marlin Stein and Bryan Carboni

Q - What's the difference between a Park Bench and a Black Man ? A - The Park Bench can support a family.

Knock Knock! Who's there? Reclu. Reclu who? Recluse Spider.

Why do black people always sit in the back of the bus? There aren't any available seats in the front.

PENIS

Your muma is so ugly she went to a ugly competition and got kicked out "no pros aloud".

A black man, a chinese man, and a dog decide to have a race. Unfortunately, they are shot by a sniper on a roof while still in the planning stages.

Whats the difference between a giraffe and an elephant. Ones a giraffe and ones and elephant

Women drivers...

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car.

A blind man walks into a bar No literally he does, he has a guide dog and everything, he's a capable member of society, don't be rude.

What did Batman tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile

what did one dog say to another dog? ....nothing, because they can only bark.

How did the man know he was gay? Australia is full of kangaroos

"New season of Dr.Phil. How does that make you feel?" ANGERY!!!!!

-What's long, hard and full of semen? -Since this is a play on words both an erect penis and a naval submarine could apply here

The teacher asks Timmy "why is your cat at school today?" Timmy says, crying, "Because I heard my daddy say to my mommy, 'I'm going to eat that pussy when the kids leave.' so I'm saving him!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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