Santa Clause, a smart blonde, and the Queen of England all jump out of a plane, which hits the ground first? Galileo's theory tells us that all objects fall at the same speed regardless of weight, so they all hit simultaneously.

Why did children rejoice when Michael Jackson died? Because they were at a birthday party, and only heard about his death afterward.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows because a chicken is incapable of communicating it's reason to humans.

A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

Why did the Skyrim guard stop adventuring? He was killed in action and his family misses him terribly.

Yo' momma is so old she should probably go to the doctor and check her health so she can live a longer, more healthy life.

What do you say when you see a flying donkey Wtf

When is a door not a door? When it's a pair of titties!

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? All of them.

What is funny about a man who chews tobacco? Nothing, the man was diagnosed with mouth cancer at a young age and got his jaw removed, he was very upset.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree Because it died

Whats the difference between 10 dead babies and 8 dead babies? 2 dead babies.

What do you call someone that blows up a plane? Nothing you were on that plane

Knock knock. Who's there? Justin. Hello Justin, please come in.

Q :Why did the girl fall off the swing? A: She had no arms.

What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

Yo momma so old that she should be concerned about mesothelioma and asbestoses, as she may have lived during a period of increased asbestos use. She may also be at risk of osteoporosis and should take vitamin supplements daily to improve her rapidly deteriorating health.

What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

Killing your friend as a joke.

A man walks into his room with a DVD and a box of kleenex. The DVD is a wedding video of his now dead wife.

An old man walks into a bar. He drinks 3 beers and dies. The bartender calls paramedics but when the police came they arrested the bartender for beating his wife. A few hours later an earthquake destroys the bar and everyone was evacuated and many were injured. The manager was driving to the scene but has a car accident with the ambulance. It was such a bad day.

Hi i love black men so much and i am a jewish faggot bye

Why did the clown fall out of the tree? He got shot.

why did Susie fall of the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who`s there? not Susie

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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