What's short, white, and is sick and tired of your shit? A toilet. What's white and killed Elvis? Also a toilet.

the duck walked in the bar then he walded away

Amanda Knox walks home free.

What's dark, has an opening, and guys like to go in it. A cave

A bison trots into a bar. The bartender says, "My pee makes bubbles in the toilet." Amazed by the urination fact, the bison explodes.

Why can't Chuck Norris die? He can, he's just a normal human being.

An old lady says, "Oh i see now." The guy standing next to her says, " Honey oyu know im blind right?"

Why did the black man go to Jail? He was visiting his friend!

How do you keep an idiot in suspense?

wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? "I don't like Asians."

What do you get when you cross Skyrim and Call of Duty? A video game that has similarities to Skyrim and Call of Duty.

Why did the train stop? - It was surrounded by elephants

you will like this because i am black.

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Max

The dog, Marley from Marley and Me. It died.

What did the man say to his wife. Hi

Stop Iran! We need the money.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because he's stupid.

What did the mentaly handycap kid get for christmas. A Bop-It

What do an airplane and a strawberry have in common? They can both fly.... Except for the strawberry

What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

what goes round , and round , and croaks? a blender in a frog.

how many baby's does it take to paint a wall?? depends how hard u throw them

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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