Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Someone asks for his autograph to which he replies. "Sure"

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How do you get a nun pregnant? You have sex with her.

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Two guys walk into a bar, a spanish guy and a black guy. They get some drinks, call a taxi to arrive home safe. And kiss their wives and kids goodnight. They go to bed early after reading a wallstreet journal. And wake up early so they can both go to their jobs as college professors. To white kids.

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "what do you want to drink" the guy says "a blue moon"

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Q: How did the girl in high school become so popular? A: She got pregnant

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Why did Oscar masturbate? He was on life support?

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Q: what do you call a guy named Aaron? A: Aaron

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How is a Jew and a White Person alike. 'cuz you touch yourself.

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A Christian and a Jew walk into a bar. The bartender says "What'll you two have to drink?" The Christian says "I'll have a beer." and get this, the Jew says................................"I'll have a beer too."

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Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

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knock knock who's there? the police you are wanted for 5 counts of 1st degree murder.

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Two men walk into a bar. And they enjoy a good night of drinking beer and playing pinball.

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What did the egg say to the cup? I love your hairdo! Girl, who is your stylist?

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Why arnt black people alowed in bars? Because monkeys don't drink beer! DER DA DER.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? As much as it is capable of. Personally depends on the weight of the wood.

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there is a man swimming in the ocean with a tree in the ground eating him up so , the cantelope asks the microwave where is the store the microwave says nothing because it is an inanimate object and cannot speak even though the cantelope can which is unfortunate

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Your Mom.

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Person 1: Your Ugly Person 2: Your mom's ugly

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Ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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if life gives you lemons, make lemonade. unless you only get one lemon, then it really hard to make a good glass..and for that matter, who said you had a juicer? it would be really hard to just squeeze the juice out of a lemon. on top of that, what kind of situation am I in that I would need lemonade? let's say if life gives you lemons, determine the best use of them based on need, local weather and economic status

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? An apple in your anti-joke

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Why did the retard have no friends? Because somebody stitched his mouth and eyes shut so he couldn't be social.

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A Catholic Priest, an Anglican Priest, and a Rabbi were in a train carriage together because they got a package deal to go to a conference on religious tolerance. Good for them.

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Jonathan is like a btterfly. They're both asianu

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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