A man walks into a bar in the morning. He is the bartender, and he works there.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It followed a trail of bird feed that was strewn across the street.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Milkman. Milkman who? I've been coming here for 14 years and you don't even know my name? I helped take your mother to the hospital for crying out loud! I held you in my arms as a baby! And you don't even have the decency to remember MY NAME?! I'm sorry I don't live in a house that allows milk and other groceries to be delivered, I'm sorry that I wasn't born into a nice family with a nice home! I'm sorry that I have had to come here EVERY WEEK FOR FOURTEEN YEARS and you can't even remember my NAME! My name! I left my family for christmas one year to go pick up that elmo doll for you when you were a kid! I saved you from that burning treehouse! I helped you with you're 3rd grade science fair project and you won! YOU WON! We took a picture together that i have kept in my wallet. And i proudly say here's me and timmy. ME AND TIMMY! TIMMY! But no...you don't need to know my name. Well good day sir. You shan't see me again.

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Homeless man....it's what's for dinner!

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A white man and a drunken black man enters the bar, the bartender calls the cop and the black man is dragged into the police car. The black man screams YOU ARE RACIST! YOU DAMN RACISTS! The cops tell him he has been walking around the streets naked the last 2 days... Oooh... I am really sorry sir says the black man. He was forgiven and went sober forever. Moral: No moral, that is the anti moral in this anti joke...and besides I am a W class celebrity.enjoy life

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didnt. Why do we have to live in a world where people have to be so concered about why a stupid chicken decides to cross a road. Shouldnt we all be more focused on ways to get a better economy, or maybe end world hunger?

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what did the first fire hi-grin say to the second fire hi-grin nothing they can talk it what just really awkward.

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Why was the African american pulled over in New Jersey? He was 17 and didn't have his red stickers.

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Did you hear the one about the Mexican that went to college? All his life, Juan wanted to get a decent education, but was unable to due to his family's low income. So Juan worked hard all his life, and got a part-time job. He made a little cash here, a little there. He also studied vigorously, getting a 33 on his ACT. All that work eventually paid off, and Juan was eventually accepted at Princeton University. Juan is now a highly paid Neurological surgeon, and has saved countless lives

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what goes boo a sock

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Homonyms should be band.

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whats the hardest answer ever? The one without a question.

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which is faster a) ferrari b) beetle a ferrari

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How do you register on webkinz? You put a rope around a durable shower neck, & then hang yourself with it.

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I'm so punny.

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Fred: Hey man where were you last night. Steve: Why don't yo ask yo mama.

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What did the tree say to the kite? She got hit by a fridge.

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Yo mama so poor that she's having trouble making ends meet without government assistance.

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why were the negros at whitney houstons funeral smiling? because there were free sandwiches!

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing, she had no arms. Knock Knock Who’s there? Not Sarah.

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Q:what has 6 legs and rides a unicycle! A: nothing!!! Duh!

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What does a black man do when drives up to a STOP sign? Stops.

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what does mandy enjoy on weekends a load of cum in her face

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A Texan, a Mexican, a Brit and a Frenchman are on a plane that begins having engine trouble. The black box was never found.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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