Why did the chicken cross the road? There was no traffic for miles and the chicken was in search of basic needs.

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Q. Pete and Repeat were sitting on a wall. Repeat fell off. Which one was left? A. Pete. Yep.

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How do you get Vladamir Putin to smile? You tickle him.

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How do you make a Chef cry? You kill his family.

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How many men does it take to change a light bulb? None, there is nothing wrong with the light bulb.

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little miss muffit sat on her tuffit eating her curds and weigh along came a spider and sat down beside her and said hey whats in the bowl?

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Look down at your keyboard. Notice that U and I are together? <3 Also notice that J and K are together too!:P

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What did the farmer say to the duck? I don't know, but the duck doesn't give a f.....

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what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

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So there's a monkey in a bar. I forgot the rest of the joke but your moms a whore

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Chuck Norris tried to return some jeans to Target and when they didn't give him his money he kickeed them in the face.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Walt dies in breaking bad.

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Refridgerator.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What's wet and pink and fun to watch in someone's face? A big bubble gum bubble exploding into someone's face.

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why was allison crying? because her mom's dead.

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What did Nick Comado say to the black person? Hello I live at 317 North 12th Street, Beech Grove, Indiana, USA. PLEASE come murder me and my family

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Can midgets still have big dreams?

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Guess what else smells like tuna!?! A dead tuna fish in a can

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A blonde a brunette and a ginger jump off a cliff they die upon impact and their families mourn for years to come.

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How do you make a tree angry Overall trees have no sense of emotion therefore it is impossible to anger a tree.

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A woman takes a shortcut through a dark alley. She is raped, robbed, and murdered. Her family mourns her death.

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Why did a mass amount of people move to Florida? They came to murder their children and get away with it.

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Many people dont know this about me, but I'm not very famous.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops