why did the monkey fall out of the tree there was no monkey

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa? You poke-poke-poker face

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Two corpses weigh in the wind. One is called Jones.

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A man walks into a bar.

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knock knock whos there? a rapiest get in my van. ok, let me just get my purse

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What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. The snake ate the mouse.

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What do you tell a woman with no black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice but you're not an abusive partner.

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Q: what's the difference between a human and a gorilla? A: they can both talk, apart from the gorilla

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I like my girls like my wisky. Strong, tastes and the leading cause of liver damage.

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What happens when you throw a red rock in a green pond? It sinks.

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Who would win in a fight, Godzilla or a Tyrannosaurus Rex? It doesn't matter because Godzilla is fictional and a T-Rex is extinct.

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Military intelligence.

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when two guys walk in somewhere late together you say. hay perv hay ert.

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Hey, you have small hands.

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what happens when you wake up inception

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Why do black people like fried chicken?? Because it was fried

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What's gay and gay? Joe

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I like your hair

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What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

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69.... is a number

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What is Mario's favorite food? I don't know. You should ask him.

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why is your mom crying? i don't know but you should be nice and offer your support.

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What did Lance Armstrong say to his critics? I have one testical

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What's worse than being a Jew in 2010? Being a Jew in 1942.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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