How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb? NONE A YO F******G BUSINESS!!!

What time is it when an elephant jumps over your fence? Actually, elephants don't jump.

how do u wake kesha up? Answer:set her alarm clock to a reasonable time

What did the homeless man's sign say? It didn't say anything. You had to read it.

What did the Beatrice do after she got kicked off of X Factor? she went to a nearby store and bought a slim jim

I used to have a shirt just like yours, except it was green. And it was a bicycle.

What do you call a black person pimping out his bitches? a dog breeder.

if you press the thumbs up button nyan cat is going to visit you tonight

A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

Why do we park in driveways and drive in parkways? Good question.

what do u call a 7th grade ninga joe waldeaker the sarah freek

what do santa clause and a blueberry have in common they both have beards....except the blueberry

Why was the black man in Jail? He works there as a correctional officer.

What happens when an alien touches fire? It gets burnt

how many shit jokes do you need to make before you realize that random does not equal funny? TOO FUCKING MANY

Roses are red, Violets are blue, STDs are contagious. Careful who you screw!

In Opposites Land, you might think the opposite of small is big. But no, it's nail clippers.

Why did Adolf Hitler Start WWII and kill millions of Jews? Because he was a poweful dictator

What do you call a bad yo mama joke? your mom

Why wasn't Susie happy? because she was raped by her grandfather.

Your mom is so fat that she turns "One Size Fits All" to "One Size Fits Most"

What smells like pizza and likes to roll? Pizza rolls.

Why does Toby suck! Because he sucks!

What do you call a blonde falling off a cliff? Screwed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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