A black man and a white man get married... Trick question, since gay marriage is illegal in the United States, the men did not get married, and they later both died alone.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because it was raining.

thumb_up thumb_down

A man says to his wife, "Honey, sex just hasn't been the same lately." "That's probably because of my yeast infection," replies his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down

Knock knock Who's there Your Mother Come in

thumb_up thumb_down

A black guy and a Puerto Rican are in a car. Who's driving? Most likely one of the two, because if they were not that would be illegal.

thumb_up thumb_down

Friends are like trees. They fall when hit multiple times with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down

Chris:"knock, knock" Rhianna:"owwww..." Chris:"open da door" Rhianna:"so u can punch me in the face" Chris:"duhhh, I jus got brass knuckles"

thumb_up thumb_down

Whats worse than the holocaust A: not much

thumb_up thumb_down

an alien is walking down the street he can't breathe our air and quickly suffocates and dies

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did John fall off his bike? Because, he is a fish and fish cannot ride bikes.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the little girl stop riding her bike? She was hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to go well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that when his wife was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas, despite that the tank was full and she only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrendous car accident that caused the fuel to empty and catch fire. Mary survived but their 6 month old baby was killed.

thumb_up thumb_down

Life on the line? I just do it for the kill and the potential savage rape and consumption! And yeah, a man is not a man but a boy if he cant protect his lady friends. HEY WAIT A FUCKING MOMENT! Why you playing so hard to get now? YOUR FLESH IS MINE! It is just like a billion pages ago where we where talking VERY down and dirty.

thumb_up thumb_down

How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a light bulb??? I don't know don't ask me when I'm asking you the question!!!

thumb_up thumb_down

Whats funnier than throwing a baby off the top of a building? The sound it makes when it hits the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down

How many Jews can you fit in a Car? 2 in the front seat 3 in the back seat 5 in the trunk and a couple thousand in the Ashtray -WSS Gaming

thumb_up thumb_down

A plane crashes near an uncharted island with a low supply of fresh water and hardly any animals, except for a few deadly ones. How do the survivors live until rescuers show up? -There were no survivors from the plane crash

thumb_up thumb_down

A black person dies.

thumb_up thumb_down

A bishop died and went to heaven. At the Pearly gates he sees Saint Peter , so he says to Peter "All my life I've been a committed Christian, but I just before I died I was tempted by a woman of ill repute". Saint Peter says "This is just an illusion, your dying brain is merely conjuring up images based on your presuppositions of an 'afterlife'. You have about three seconds left"

thumb_up thumb_down

A man and his wife are disagreeing about what type of car to get. The wife continously nags him about getting her something that will go from 0-200 in 4 seconds, so he gets her a scale and buys himself a truck, 1 min later an abulance is called because the wife hit the husband with his new car.

thumb_up thumb_down

Geeks have girlfriends...................... . . . I MEAN alien friends (geeks are losers and you decide your a geek or not)

thumb_up thumb_down

this new cologne, it's kind of gross smelling.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is black, white and red all over? Something that pertains those characteristics

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops