Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? because she's a woman

what's grosser then 1000 babies stapled to a tree?? 1 baby stapled to 1000 trees

The Oakland Raiders

Who is the best person to do your nails with? Nobody, you have no friends.

What do you call 25 college teens at a party? A good time.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

What did the raped girl get for Christmas? Pregnant.

whats worse then getting sat on by a hippo getting sat on by Matt Ross

What is similar about Michael Jackson and Walmart? Nothing they have nothing to do with each other

What do you call a skeleton in a closet? The hide-and-seek champion.

I was going to tell a joke about your mom's vagina, but that's overused.

How did superman always save the day? Because he was a fictional tv actor so he could do whatever he wanted to.

Q: Where does the queen of england live? A: This was the question I had to anwser to be able to post this joke.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog

drugs.

ask me what my temperpedic bed is like. ''whats it like?'' i dont know ive never had one actully.

The original Moral Man has left Horsehead network, but I will keep monitoring this section for like 3 hours... Then probably never again on this shit site it barely works ffs! Moral: "Turn every stone, and you might find a penny, turn every penny and you might find a stone that stone is in our shoe, kick it away, crush it, destroy it"

Where did the guy who shot his neighbor go? Jail, because he was caught, sent to court, and was convicted of murder.

Q. The farmer said where's my bucket A. Somewhere

Roses are red, Violets are blue if something smells bad, its gotta be you! Roses are red this much is true but violets are purple not f***ing blue!

Why did the squirrel fall out the tree? It was dead Why did the second squirrel fall out the tree? It was stapled to the first squirrel Why did the the third squirrel fall out the tree? Peer pressure Why did the fourth squirrel fall out the tree? It thought it was a game Why did the tree fall over? It thought it was a squirrel Why did the postman die? He got hit in the head by four squirrels and a tree

A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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