what does matt daly like to do in his free time anal

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A bishop died and went to heaven. At the Pearly gates he sees Saint Peter , so he says to Peter "All my life I've been a committed Christian, but I just before I died I was tempted by a woman of ill repute". Saint Peter says "This is just an illusion, your dying brain is merely conjuring up images based on your presuppositions of an 'afterlife'. You have about three seconds left"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's the difference between Izzy and a hobo? Nothing...they both have no job and no friends

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Yo mama's so fat, that when she jumped, gravity pushed her back to the floor!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 17

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man sees another man sitting on a bench with a pickle in his ear. He asks the man "Why do you have a pickle in your ear?" The other man replies "What? I couldn't hear you because I have a pickle in my ear."

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what did the homeless man get for Christmas? nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you get 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's sadder then a dead puppy? 2 dead puppies.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Whats bent but straight for danielle? Joseph Plummer

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is the hardest thing about eating a vegetable? the wheelchair

thumb_up thumb_down -4

There once was a man from Nantucket. He was among thousands of men who were also from Nantucket.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's Hitler's favorite beverage? Soda! Not Juice (jews) you asshat!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock knock! Who's there? Bob Hi bob, come inside. And next time just use the doorbell

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's the difference between a clown and a dead baby? One makes people laugh and the other is a clown.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the paralyzed kid get for his 18th birthday? A boner.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you make a person who wins the lottery sad? You threaten to kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why is this joke funny It isn't

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's worse than finding a work in your apple? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is the #1 cause of pedophiles? Sexy children

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

An invisible man sleeping in your bed! Who ya gunna call? Most likely the local police department to report the strange incident possibly brought on by lack of sleep. NOT Bill Murray.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops