there once was a man from Nantucket. He was a fisherman.

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Q: What did the kid with no arms and legs get for christmas? A: Cancer

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm What is worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Finding chuck norris Whats worse than finding your girlfriend has a bigger Slong than you? Getting raped with a cheese grater. Whats worse than all of these? Being black Sadly im black :( -Jordan M

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You have now entered Automatic Breathing Mode

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Wanna hear a joke? Once upon a time, there was a successful Mexican.

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How do you kill a hobo? Throw a penny off a clif.. How do you kill another hobo? Tell him the penny's still down there

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness. Oh come on in, I would love to learn more about your religion.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven stabbed his mother.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm gonna f*ck you with a rake.

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So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

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"The only thing worse than being talked about is getting AIDS." -Oscar Wilde

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A guy was beet by his wife.

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What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Why is there a man painted green throwing forks at me

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why did the baby start crying? because he was very hungry and hadn't been feed all day

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What's black white and red all over A Nun after being pushed down the stairs

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I remember my grandfather's last words he said to me before he kicked the bucket...."Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

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What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

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Q: A boy went to 7-11 and bought Coke instead of 7up. Why? A: I don't know

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A man walks into a bar. Oh, wait, no. It was a horse. So... A man walks into a horse

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A woman walks into a bar She is raped.

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Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be severely mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" Turns out a man suffering from schizophrenia believes he is a bartender for animals as his health slowly declines as his family comes to visit him every day.

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justin bieber: ask me if im a boy are you a boy? no.

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Q; What's the new slogan for the TSA? We handle more junk than EBay.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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