Knock, knock Who's there? You're adopted...

There was a mexican and a african in a car, who was driving? The cop, because both of these men are rapists.

how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

Politics.

Why did the cheeseburger have seeds on its buns? Because it wasn't a taco.

Last time I heard that I dropped my i-phone

When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

You're on fire.

My friend came out.....of the bathroom so I could shit

how do you wake up lady gaga poke her face

A: Knock, knock. B:Who's there? A: It's your neighbor, Sam. B: Oh, well my extended family is over for dinner at the moment. Would you mind coming back later? A: I suppose that would be alright.

I'm funny.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was Catholic and was having an identity crisis. Thinking that he was the road, he panicked and crossed himself.

Why was Jeremy slow? He wasnt fast.

Why couldn't Spiderman pay his rent? He didn't have enough money.

SOCIOPATH SAYS: Bitch, rate all my comments thumbs up, if you do I wont rape you... YOu know unless I feel like, women kinda like it when men are in touch with their feelings... SO yeah... Im gonne touch your feelings ;) Nah, nope, no homo, you a gal? We can meet! Voluntary rape! (No I did not say voluntary sex, rape, you can say the saferword: OMG SO GOOD HARDER HARDER! If I you know... Am about to kill you... Which I will do if we get to that stage anyways... Relax ill recycle you. Moral: NeroMetal Think Recycling! Save our planet! ITS LIKE RAPING AND KILLING A PERSON!

What's worse than going to boot camp? - going to concentration camp.

A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

How do porcupines have sex? The male begins by urinating all over the female. He then enters her from behind and proceeds to thrust until the act is completed.

What did the atheist say when he was in the church? The eulogy for his best friend.

Roses are read bacon is good poems are hard .........BACON

why did the chef go to jail? because he was caught beating an egg

A guy walks into a bar, and then orders a jack and coke.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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