Bob goes to the store and buys some food.

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What's the difference between two elephants? One is dead.

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How does a yeti say hi? Raaawwwrrrr

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Q: What does Chinese look like? A:Chinese

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Roses are red, violets are blue, my name is cartman, kyle you're a jew

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Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

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Whats white and sticky? Marshmellows

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whats the difference between a ferrari in my garage, and a pile of dead babies in my garage. I do not have a ferrari but i do have a pile of dead babies

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my mind's eye?

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Yeah, I know too, its as if "Omg he has not replied in 5 seconds something must be wrong", sorry about that. Not endorphin person? That cannot be too good.

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Too tired to come up with the definition, by the way, it was I that came up with the code system you guys use, so I kinda knew long ago that you lied to me when you said you do not use passwords,

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united we sit, cause we're fat

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? To get to Your House. Knock Knock. Who's there? The chicken

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The closest I've been to an animal charity was when I walked past it to by myself a fur coat

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How do you make a Child cry? Slaughter his dog and feed it to him convincing him its Chili

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Your mamma's so dumb, we are seriously worried she might hurt herself.

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Who is the Greek god of STDS? Herpies

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Reilly and Ross went up to fetch a pale of water when a triceratops turned them into bagels then ate them and later crapped them out....

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Get it? More.

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Q: What would George Washinton do if he was alive today? A: Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

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Q:How do you confuse a blonde preschooler? A:Calculus.

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A black man takes a girl home from a nightclub. She says "Show me it's true what they say about black men". So he reveals a big penis and they have sex there and then.

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Dubstep = a computer with a noisy virus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops