why did your mom leave your dad because he was a drunk :l

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I had friends on the Death Star.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

whats long, orange, and comes out of brown stuff? -a carrot.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A women in the kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

if you don't like this you're gay

thumb_up thumb_down +6

whats worse than watching your house burn to the ground? Sarah Palin becoming president

thumb_up thumb_down +6

say it ten times fast: oh

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what do u call something black and hanging from a tree.............................. a black guy

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Hitler.. Hitlar... Hillar... Hillary Clinton

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q. why did the chicken cross the road A. damn it this joke is a million years old shut up

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Because you touch yourself at night

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A poor boy receives his first wrapped present in his entire life. Why did he hate it so much? Because it was a copy of "Mien Kampf" Is he Jewish? No, he actually does know what "Mien Kampf" is because he is poor and cannot read.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Eight, because there's one tickle per tentacle!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is funnier than 24? The fact that you think numbers are funny?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Patient: "Doctor, I have a strawberry stuck in my bum" Doctor: "Well, that's an awfully peculiar place to keep a strawberry. What were you thinking?"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Good afternoon.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the bus crash? Because the bus driver was a potato.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What'd the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? New shoes and some gloves

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was ran over before it made it to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

why cant dinosaurs talk? because they're all dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Given the unlikely circumstance in which an elephant actually does sit on your fence, it is equally unlikely said elephant would be able to do so unseen by witnesses, of whom you may ask what time the event occurred. Assuming your witness thought to look at the time befor calling animal control.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house? A: That depends how hard you throw them... Q: Whats worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees...

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: What's grey and can't climb trees A: A car park

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops