Chikin nuggets

"I see London; I see France..." "Wow. You must have exceptional eyesight."

3 jews are walking into a bar. the first jew orders a shot of vodka, drinks it and says "long live my family!" the second jew orders a shot of whiskey, drinks it and says "long live my friends" the third jew orders water, because he is the one that is driving tonight.

Knock Knock Who's there? Sargeant John Smith mam. I regret to inform you that your husband died in the line of fire - I'm sorry.

A horse walks into a bar... Horses are not indigenous to China.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a sponge is not a who, it is a what.

What do you call a black man in a suit? A lawyer.

'I had a surprise test today.' 'What happened?' 'I was really surprised.'

What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

why is billy g is really supid because he gets bad grades

Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Brian. Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Viciously beating your children with other recently beaten children.

w8's white and speaks russian a russian stronk

Once there was two fish in a tank, and one said "how do you drive this thing?".

Did you hear the one about the priest, the rabbi, the astronaut, the olympic diver, the mcdonald's employee, and the web designer? Neither did I...

Whats the differnce betwwen a Wheelbarrow and a sack of dead babies The wheelbarrow is not in my garage

What did hitler say when he spilt coffee all over himself Ow I am burnt

Why could'nt Boris fit in with the other kids? His name was Boris.

1.Knock Knock 2.Who's there? 1.Boo 2.Boo Wh- The second person realized that the first person was about to make him cry so he stabbed the first person. 2.Who's cryin now Son!

Want to hear a joke about Potassium? So do I.

My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

Why did the chicken cross the road? there were no more cars in the way

Your momma's so ugly she adopted you because she had a problem attracting men.

Why did the boy kill his father? Because he was molesting him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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