What's better than having sex ? Having sex and being rich.

Yo momma is so ugly, that your father can no longer stand her. They are getting divorced.

A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

What's the best part about the school burning down? All the children trapped inside never had to grow up

Why did little Suzie spill her drink? Since birth, she has lacked a jaw.

Whats the difference between a quarter and a penny? 24 cents.

How many Jews can fit in a Volkswagen beetle? Four, although five is possible if you are not afraid of getting a ticket.

What did the ginger say to the blond? Hello, what is your name?

Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

How do you knock a clown off a swing? Hit it with an axe multiple times.

Q: what do you call a boy with no arms and an eye patch? A: names

A blind man walks into a bar. He cannot read the drink menu.

Why did stevie get stabbed in the jugular by his sister? He was telling bad anti jokes.

Two cows in a field one says Moo the other says, Moo

1657 is a cool number, when a leprachaun sings it sounds like pie drinking an obese penguin (do you know what I mean....) :D

A Jehovah's Witness knocks on my door. I didn't answer the door.

Whats worse being raped by jack the ripper or being fingered by captain hook

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Shark bait.

Helen Keller went to town riding on a pony she stuck a feather in her hat and called it uuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Why did the Asian crash her car? Someone shit on her windsheild.

what did the boy with dyslexia get for his birthday? bad grades

Why are Jewish men circumcised? Because it is the norm with that particular religious group to circumcise male infants shortly after birth.

sally has no arms knock knock who's there not sally

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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