Why did the hipster burn his tongue? The tea he was drinking was at an unsuitable temperature for consumption resulting in the scalding of his mouth.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Why are you asking me this question? That's awful and you should be ashamed of yourself.

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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Hickory Dickory Dock, your mother is a whore

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What's the difference between a good anti joke, and a bad anti joke? There literally is no good anti joke.

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How do you fit 76 babies in a bath tub... With a blender. How do you get them back out? With tortilla chips.

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A British man walks into a dentist's office.

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What do you call a man who eats another man? An man eater.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Not because she had no arms, but because she just had no hands.

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How do you kill a blond? Put a scratch and sniff card at the bottom of a pool.

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Why can't you fit 100 oranges in a bathtub? Because motorcycles don't have doors

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What is yellow and Bear Grills has drunk on National Television. ...Lemonade.

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Q: why did Suzy fall off the swing? A: she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzy.

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why did sally drown? because she had no arms or legs and couldn't swim.

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What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

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A black man walks into a... nevermind, this joke is dumb.

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What do you call a Mexican on the moon? Quite an unusual circumstance consedering Mexico doesn't currently have a space program. Not only that but Nasa hasen't even had people going to the moon since the 1970s.

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What happened to the guy that got shot? He fell down

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Have you ever tried grabbing a bottle of 7-up free and walked away with it? Moral: If it says its free, its free ffs!

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Have you ever seen what Stevie Wonder looks like without his sunglasses? Neither have I.

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Q: Why does the chicken cross the road? A: To get hit by a redneck.

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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An elephant and a hippopotamus were taking a bath. The elephant said to the hippo, " Please pass the soap." The hippo replied, "No soap, radio."

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Godzilla steps on a bar and orders a Scotch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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