A horse walked into a bar, broke its leg and its owner then had to put it down because it was a racing horse and the owner did not have enough money to bring the horse back to health. Fuck you.

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what's harder than dodging bullets? dodging rain

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Obama 2012

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A horse walks into a bar and then out of the bar

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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What did one platypus say to the other? Whatever noise platypuses make. I'm not sure. I am sure that they lay eggs though.

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How many Facebook friends does George Bush have? None because he doesn't have a Facebook.

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A man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender immediately tells him to leave as they don't allow pets.

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What's the difference between a large pizza and a black man? The pizza is a delicious Italian classic dish, while the latter is a human being which man frown at the notion of consuming.

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So a priest and an atheist sit next to eachother train After talking to eachother for a short period of time, the priest discovers the other man's beliefs and procededs to spend the rest of the ride trying to convert the atheist. Incredibly irritated the atheist gets off the train a stop early to escape the tirade. The next day the atheist sees on tv that the train crashed right after getting off, and the priest is listed amongst the people killed in the accident. He is ecstatic, and says to himself "ha, proof of divine retribution," but then he feels confused because he realizes he doesn't believe in a god...

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You.

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I went to see a fight and all of a sudden a hockey game broke out.

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Q: what did the hot dog say to the hamburger A: i want your buns

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Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

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How do you fit 100 babies in a bucket? put them in a blender. How do you get them out? potato chips.

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What do you call a fly with no wings? Joseph

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LOL -LOL GUY

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Women deserve equal rights... April fools.

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What color is a banana? yellow.

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What's similar between a flamingo and a rhino? They're both pink...except the rhino

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whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

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panda bears are racist to mexicans-they are black, white and asian

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Why was the boy sad? I don't know, ask him.

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What did the English teacher write on a sheet of assignment criteria? The assignment criteria. Plus, she spelled "millennium" wrong.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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