Your momma is so fat, shes skinny.

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What did the raped girl get for Christmas? Pregnant.

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How do you make a French-man cry? Kill his family.

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall, He cracked his skull and died on impact. He will be missed.

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person: Ask me if i'm a tree other person: are you a tree? person: no

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This is a little story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought that Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done

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What do you call a monkey holding a hand grenade? It depends on what its name is.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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hey chris what yu doing wit my back pack? using it..

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How did the retarded, blind child win the Special Olympics? He didn't, he died of terminal lung cancer the year before. R.I.P.

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Why did Sally have a headache? She had a Brian tumor the size of an eggplant.

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Where's the best place to buy moon bars? Michael Toal

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Does this smell like chloroform to you?

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So a guy walks into a bar. It hurt really bad. He was pissed, so he went home and took his seal to a club.

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why was six afraid of seven? seven was a sex offender

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What did the man say when his wife said hello? Hello.

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A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

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What was Steve Jobs' favorite fruit? Grapes.

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What do Michael Jordan and Michael Jackson have in common? The same first name.

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What did the old man catch at a baseball game? Aids.

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Who the heck do you think you are?! Ally...duh

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What do you call a blonde that just got hit by a school bus? Dead.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Who cares its a chicken, it probably got hit by a car. Go to McDonalds and get a chicken sandwich there he is

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops