What do you call a Mexican with a lawnmower? The guy I'm thinking of is named Pedro. He works hard and takes care of his family.

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If you're paddling upstream in a canoe and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes fit in a doghouse? None! Ice cream doesn't have bones!

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What's ugly and has shit smeared over its teeth? Smelly McD (He also wears bin bag clothes)

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How do you get to the store, if your car is broken down? Steal a blind girls bike, she can't ride it anyway!

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What is black and hangs from a white supremacists tree? His kids tire swing.

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Why did the man eat a human heart? Because he was part of a dangerous, religious cult.

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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What's worse then spilling milk? Instantaneous Human Combustion

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A rapist leaps out a woman and yells "surprise!" and proceeds to have non-consensual intercourse with her. Later, he is arrested by the police and charged with sexual assault.

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What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

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What did the man say to his wife before she made him a sandwhich? Do your job and make me a sandwhich.

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J?????????????????o??????????????????????k?????????????????????????e?????????????????????????????????????s??????????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????o??????????????????????n??????????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????y???????????????????????????????????o????????????????????????????????u????????????????????????????????.?????????????????????????????.????????????????????.????????????????????????

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How many Jews can you fit in a one-person car? --One in the drivers seat, 30 million in the ashtray

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We are as to jokes as atheists are to religion.

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Your momma's so stupid, she threw out all the W's in the m&m's packet

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Moon: The sun shines bright like a virgin. He must be high..

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, these two statement are obvious unless you are color blind

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A man walks into a bar hes later assassinated and mourned by his family.

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Q Whats the difference between a pich fork with watermelons and a pitch for with dead babies stuck on. A The pitchfork with the dead babies were severly shot in the kidneys and then the heart. Blake

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Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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The man walked into the church and stayed there.

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What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

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roses are red violets are blue wendy williams looks like a man roses are red violets are blue i coach penn state pull down your pants

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Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Your neighbor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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