A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the beer from the other man and throws it on the floor, breaking it. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

Why was the Jewish boy afraid of an oven? The last oven malfunctioned and killed his father.

Knock knock! Why didn't you use the doorbell?

Whats Big, Brown, and smells like Horse Crap? Horse Crap

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others just don't

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is a chicken and is not intelligent enough to know that he is about to be hit by a bus while hopelessly searching for food under an elderly man's nose.

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.....

What do you call an office worker with no arms or legs? A paraplegic.

Godilla walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

A man says to another man, "Why the long face?" He then replies, "I have an elongated face, hands, and feet due to acromegaly."

Say this to someone: On a scale from one to ten, what is your favorite color?

You know what really grinds my gears? Insufficient lubricant.

what do you call a clown in makeup? a clown, clowns are supposed to wear makeup.

a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

A black man walks into a KFC. He buys a bucket of chicken, then distributes it to several homeless men he supports off of his meager income because he knows their situations are much worse than his.

What is worse than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Obama

roses are read, violets are blue. i have alzheimers and Jill came tumbling down.

If an asian man is really angry with a jewish man named gabriel what does he say? Gabriel I am angry with you

why did the boy die he had a raging case of cardiovascular disease

Q:how many ping-pong balls do you need te get a crocodile off of a slide ? A:none, because an engine doesn't have doors

Why is Short Circuit the best movie ever made? Because it tastes like lemons

Wuts brown and smelly? Brown smelly stuff.

Where did the kid go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere

oh whatever donald trump's not going to be president. stop pretending he is

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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