Doctor, Doctor, I feel like there's two of me! There's not. Your long lost twin died of terminal cancer.

"I never want to see you again!" shouted Stevie Wonder to the genie in the bottle, as a young boy.

Mario walks into a bar A yak walks into a bar An orange walks into a bar 30 men barf in a juicy yot

Q: What's worse than getting a divorce? A: I don't know, i'm still married.

The WNBA is on the cooking channel

Why did the women cross the road? I dont know.. why? no clue.. why was she out of the kitchen

What's worse, a dead baby or an abortion? A dead baby on a bayonet

Q; What's the new slogan for the TSA? We handle more junk than EBay.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

When you have read this, you've already read it.

stephen hawking walks into a bar...

What is black, white and red all over? A black, white and red pen.

Call of Duty Infinite Warfare

Why does a clown wear makeup? So you can't identify him to police after he shoves your kids in his tiny car and drives away.

How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

A father walks in on his kid masturbating to pictures of horses and promptly divorces his wife.

What is funnier than a dead baby? almost everything. there is nothing funny about a dead baby.

How do you get a dog and a baby mixed up? You stir your chili.

A murderer walks into a bar with a knife. He then stabs seven people and is then arrested shortly after.

knock knock who's there... you you who who the fuck are you

A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

why did the grinch steal christmas? The grinch had a rough childhood. he had an abusive father and a crack cocaine addicted mother, and as a result, the grinch never got a christmas of his own. The grinch steals the happiness of christmas from the who's becuase his horrible childhood has caused him to take his anger out on everyone around him, because the grinch believes that this will make up for his depressing childhoofd

I'M JOSH BROWN!!!!!

Knock Knock Whos there? It was the unexpected arrival of his wifes lover who'd been having an affair with her for over a year She thought her husband would be out and forgot to tell him not to come The husband started breaking down in tears whilst throwing insults at both of them, grabbing the man by his collar and throwing him on the ground he started to kick his head in The man died and the husband and wife divorced, theres now a bench in the mans local park dedicated to him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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