There was once a Polish man who was extremely sad with life because people always made fun of him. He decided to do something about it. He sat down to contemplate the situation, and after a few hours, he thought, "I have never seen anyone making fun of Italians. So, if I start talking and behaving like them, no one will be able to make out that I am Polish and make fun of me." He went into isolation for three months and after a lot of practice, he walked confidently into a shop and said, "I am a very hungry. Give me some pepperoni and zucchini." Immediately, the man behind the counter said "Are you Polish?" This guy was taken aback and he repeated his request. The man behind the counter said, "Are you Polish or not?" This man was finally very ashamed and amazed at the shop owner's discerning ability and so he admitted to the fact after which he asked, "But how did you know?" The shopkeeper replied, "My grandmother was Polish. I could tell by your accent."

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Why did the boy have pink skin at night? Because he did not put on a sufficient amount of sunscreen that morning.

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one, it's not that hard.

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Jokes are dumb. Stories are better. Did you ever hear the story of the blind man who walked into the fish market and said, "Evenin' ladies!"?

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why is coltin alexander such a duche? because no one loves him

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You know what's gay?? Lesbians

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yo mamma's so fat, when she jumped into the ocean, everyone yelled "tsunami!".

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What starts with an N and ends with R, that you wouldn't want to call a black person? Neighbor

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why are crocodiles so angry? because they have a lot of teeth but no tooth brush?

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What did the monkey say after its tail was run over by a lawnmower? It won't be long now.

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whats a muslims name with a bomb to his chest Whatever his name is HAHAHAHAHAH

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Q: What's the difference between a Boyscout and a Jew? A: Boyscouts come home from camp.

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What's red and blue and goes 105 MPH? A red and blue car.

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anus

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roses are red , thankyou for stating that , i can now continue with gardening as it is my profession.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family

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Have you seen the blind man's new house? No. Neither has he.

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A guy went to a girl asked if she wanted to have sex with him. She said yes and they promptly had sex.

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why did the girl moan in pain? she got punched in the face.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing?? ShE had no arms. Knock knock... Whose there? Not Susie

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whats the difference between this joke and other jokes other jokes have a punch line

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your mom is so stupid she got raped

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What's small, furry and looks like a mouse? Most probably a mouse but given the large number of mammals with similar appearances to a mouse it could easily be a shrew, vole or even a rat if you don't know your rodents very well.

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Nock nock Who's there K K who? You forgot the K

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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