Whats red and cant fly a plane. An apple.

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Your so ugly That when you look into a mirror it shows an accurate potrail of your unproportionit face

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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A crazy priest squats down and poops in the middle of the church... nobody understood what was going so they pointed and laughed.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the overwhelming feeling of self doubt created by an abusive drug addicted father which has left him seeking life threatening situations that should never befall a simple chicken.

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What's green and has wheels? A cucumber with wheels.

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Your mama's so fat, she gets confused with Santa Claus.

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What is white, and hurts when it falls from a tree? -tom

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Why are atheists stupid? Actually, statistically, they are more intelligent than believers.

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why does king kong so fat? because he eats to much

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To be honest that sounds like more of a mental health issue and not something I'm qualified to deal with as a GP. Let me refer you.

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How do wake up Lady Gaga You Poker her face

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whats white and smells like black paint? nothing, white paint even though it is still paint has a slightly different smell due to the difference in dye colors used to make it

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why was the dog barking?? bryan is a douche..... get it troupe.

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What's the difference between an orange? Mooses don't like to wear sweater-vests.

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Chuck Norris can watch TV.

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A guy walks into a bar, he has a few drinks than leaves.

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Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange. Aren't You Glad I Didn't Say Cliterus?

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What happened to the boy who fell off the swing? He got hurt.

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How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

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What do you call a dead blond in a closet? A homicide victim.

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If you helped Jack on the horse, would you help Jack off the horse? Of course; if he was too short to climb onto the saddle then it would be irresponsible and potentially dangerous not to help him off. As his riding instructor, you would be liable for any injuries Jack sustained had he attempted to dismount the horse with no assistance.

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What happened to the blonde that died her hair brown? Her hair turned brown.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops