What did the smoker say when he coughed? Ohhh dam it's turned into a smokers cough

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Huh, I never succeeded in any of those, and I tried a lot. Please tell me you never gone with something nasty like that...

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What did the blind boy get for one of his Christmas present? A cinema ticket.

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So theres this Jew, right? He got shot to death.

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a cat and a duck walk into a pub. the cat enters first and says for the duck to put all of their drinks on his bill. the duck(being a duck)says nothing because ducks cannot speak. therefore the cat shouldnt have been speaking either.

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Why did the tornado cross the road? Because it's a tornado, that's what tornadoes do.

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Silence is golden, duct tape is silver.

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Why did the astronaut drop his toolbox? Because he ran out of air.

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What s the difference between a pigeon ?

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Why did the weiner dog puncture Doris's bladder? It got carried away during an oral sex session.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know you have to ask the chicken if you speak chicken

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anti jokes are gay...your all gay

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a man ran into a bar screaming. he now has a severe coma

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What is the difference between a black man and a potato? Well, there are a great many differences. But the main one is probably that a potato is a potato, and a black man is a black man.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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Your mama is so fat. Just look at her.

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A black guy pulls into a KFC drive thru and orders some chicken. The cashier tells him that they are out of chicken, so the black goes to McDonald's instead.

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POLITE NOTICE: Management Committee here. Please refrain from posting any anti-jokes which are not offensive to protected groups.

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Chuck Norris has a chin under his beard.

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What did one penguin say to the other? Flippty-flop-dop-boop-de-bop. Jazzhands.

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How do you make a boy cry? Kill his family

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Why did Jimmy throw butter out the window? Because he had down syndrome

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Someone loses their golfball in the trees. Their playing partner replies: "what is this? This berenstein bears?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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