why was 6 afraid of seven? cause 7's a n i g g a

What do you call a calculator without a brain? A calculator.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

Text this number just cuz 16305208722

Why did the boy take the girls backpack? he has this many hands

Why did Michael Jackson get so many nose jobs? He was incredibly insecure.

What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

Betty White's wrinkly ass skin.

Why did Jimy fell down the stairs, because he was adopted.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

why did Jen fall off the swing? because she had no arms. knock knock who's there not Jen

You mama's so fat, that the doctor suggested that she go on a diet.

Me and the wife spent her Birthday in bed, if you know what I mean. We're both severely disabled.

Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad that this joke took your mind off your terminal cancer?

What's worse than 100 dead babies stapled to a wall? 100 live babies stapled to the wall!!!

Two monkeys are sittin in a bathtub. The first monkey says to The second, "HEY! pass the soap." The second says to the The first monkey, "DUDE. thats not soap, its a typewriter!!!!"

A man with Down's Syndrome walks into bar. Bartender asks, "why the long face?"

Batman vs Superman the movie spoilers: Batman and Superman argue over how to handle some alien invaders, Batman wants to kill em, Superman believes he can save em. In the end they work together and save everybody. Moral: I hope they change the script, ever noticed how every hero vs hero themed movie/cartoon, ends up with them allying at the end? If ya do not believe me, just wait for the movie to come out.

Roses are red Violets are blue Cats meow Dogs have four legs

A guy forgot his 20th wedding anniversary. His wife was really mad, and said that she better have something in the driveway that goes from 0 to 350 in 10 seconds, and he quickly pulled out an AK-47 and murdered her violently.

What's the difference between a dead baby and a carpet? I don't sell carpets.

Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

What rhymes with shuck and starts with an f flamethrower

What do polar bears have that no other animal has? Polar bear babies.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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