My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

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A man walked in a bar had 4 drinks and walked home because drunk driving is dangerous

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How do you tell if someone is a Jew? Ask them politely.

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Knock Knock Who's there? me oh

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What's white and sticky? A white stick.

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Q: why are kittens so cute? A: because god created them that way. go fourth and enjoy kittens.

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A woman got in her car to drive to work. She kept her hands on the wheel and eyes on the road and was able to avoid any accidents that could have occurred.

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a man walks into a bar he is an alcohol and it's ruining his family

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Q:What are black basketball players good at? A:Running,shooting and stealing.

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A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

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What couldn't the stereotypical pirate get into the movie? Well, considering that the stereotypical pirate existed in the sixteenth to eightteenth centuries and the first motion picture wasn't made until the mid to late nineteenth century, also the technology for time travel does not exist nor has it ever, I would have to derive that he was not let in due to the fact that there was no way for him to ever exist at the same time that a movie would have been playing.

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Roses are red It's 4 in the morning I have full blown aids I'm going to bed now, this is boring

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Knock, Knock. Come in.

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a man cries out to god.... and god does't reply.

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What did the Catholic preist say to the altar boy? You've been a good altar boy.

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What couldn't the Asian drive? Because he had just gotten laser eye surgery, and the doctor recommended that he didn't drive for a few days.

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Who is a nazi? • Theo Kingdom

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A kitten walks into a bar and orders a saucer of milk. Everyone enjoys the novelty of his presence.

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why did the blond stare at a carton of orange juice for 2 hours? because she was reading the nutrition list, and she is a slow and patient reader.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? - "Robin, get in the Batmobile"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Zebras.

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whats silver and cries? a coin, although it can't cry because its a coin. So it's just silver

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Kid 1: "Want a Hurts Doughnut?" Kid 2: "Umm... sure." Kid 1 opens up a box of freshly baked Hurts doughnut from Hurts Bakery and gives one to kid 2

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -.......

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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