How many jews can get in a Volvo? 5.

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What did the homosexual eat for breakfast? A light meal consisting of fruit and whole grains, so he could keep his weight down.

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Q: What is hard and long on a man? A: His wife's funeral

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Why was the gorilla crying? His brother died

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Edward and Bella looked at each other. Then they both died. Oh, and Jacob is actually a transvestite.

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What is the worst part about being a black Jew? Having to sit at the back of the gas chamber.

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A bear walks into a bar. The building is evacuated swiftly but several people are killed

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Hey, where'd my tractor go?

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What's my name? I don't know u tell me.

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What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink? What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink?

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34

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Ow, there's an arrow in my knee!

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What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

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It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

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why did the boy drop his ice cream? he tripped over his mother's dead body

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How can you kill a blonde? Hack her to bits.

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How do you stop a run-away bus? You sit down in the driver's seat and gently place your foot on the brake pedular and proceed to press it down. The brake pads, located in the calipers, will squeeze the brake discs and slow the bus eventually to stop at the crosswalk for the old lady accompanied by a young boy scout to cross the street and continue their wonderful lives.

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A blonde walks into a salon and says "I would like to get my golden locks trimmed." The haircutter replies "surely, just sit yourself down in that chair over there and I'll be with you momentarily." The blonde walks to the chair and sits down. When the haircutter comes over he asks her, "would you please remove your headset, I can't cut your hair while they're on." She laughs at her forgetfulness and removes them obligingly.

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What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A car that is driving recklessly and happens to have a Christmas paint scheme.

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FIRE!!

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What would George Washington do if he was alive today? Scream and scrach at the top of his coffin.

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Yo mama so stupid she liked this joke

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Q: why are kittens so cute? A: because god created them that way. go fourth and enjoy kittens.

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i think i have a problem with these jokes they aren't finny

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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