Hey, Batman Yeah? Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why was little Timmy afraid of his dentist? Because he was 10 foot scorpion.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

roses are red yoda is green my lightsaber needs 2 hands if you know what i mean

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What do you call Jake Morter? Jake Morter

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Yo mamma's so stupid, she couldn't get a high paying job and had to settle for working full time at McDonalds, just to get your family through the week.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

thumb_up thumb_down +28

So a ninja walks into a bar and he sees a cowboy and the ninja says i will kill you with my mad ninja skills and the cowboy says who needs mad ninja skills when you got a gun

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A black guy and a white guy both get pulled over by a cop for speeding. The white guy is promptly released with a stern warning, whle the black guy is thouroughly questioned and has his car searched for drugs, with the probable cause being that the black guy has bloodshot eyes, reeks of weed and has a bong in his frontseat.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Two twins are born only a minute apart. There is a mistake at the hospital and they are seperated. Years later they reconnect on Oprah and realize they do not have much in common.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

How do you sabotage someone's car? Drop a fridge on it

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What did the black man say to the mexican? Hello

thumb_up thumb_down +28

whats worse than forgetting your lunch at home? getting diagnosed with type 1 diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What kind of horse can do a backflip? No kind of horse.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Q: What did the farmer say when his tractor broke down? A: oh noo my tractor broke down.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Hey girl, are you from Jamaica? Cus ja makin me go temporarily insane.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A: What did the orphan get for christmas? Q: Nothing she doesn't have any parents

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Guess what? AIDS!

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Jesus can walko water Humans are 70% water I can walk on humans Therefore i am 70% Jesus

thumb_up thumb_down +26

So I was blow drying my penis and my girlfriend asked what I was doing. Apparently, "heating up your dinner." wasn't the right response.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

There was a farmer had a dog and Bingo was his name-oh But the farmer killed and ate him, because Bingo licked himself inappropriately

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Chuck Norris walks into a bar, and asks for directions to the nearest Applebee's.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's brown, sticky and crawls up your leg? A homesick poo.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops