teacher: what do you call a math book with no writing in it?! student: idk what? teacher: a notebook! student: ok... thanks

What's the worse part about a Jewish man dying in a house fire? It was his birthday

why was the woman out of the kitchen, because she had to have sex with her husband in a bed

What's white, warm, and dangerous? Cum.

A man was eating a hamburger when a boy came up and took his hamburger. So the got up and went to the counter and orderd another hamburger

Roses are red, Violets are purple not f**cking blue!

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

A blindman walks into a bar... then a chair, then a pole

What did the homeless guy get for Christmas? Nothing, he's homeless.

Whats smells like a banana and is purple? A banana, I lied about the purple thing.

Why did the bird fall down? It got shot.

Johnny tried talking to his dog, there was no response.

who killed more poeple than jeffory dommer, john wayne gayce, and ted buny combined cancer

minorities

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer procrastinated fixing the latch on the coop. Did his wife warn him this would happen? Yessss! Did he listen? Noooo!

What's the best part of any family reunion? Sodomy.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

So, a man walks into a doctor's office. He says, "Doctor, it hurts when I bent my arm like this." The doctor tells the man that it is simply a sprained muscle after thorough examination.

Why did the fish cross the road? Because the chicken was carrying an aquarium.

A old man walks into a hospital He doesn't come back out

Man walks into a bar and goes, "Ouch!"

Why didn't the blond cry at her child's funeral? She died, too. It was a terrible accident.

What do you call a mexican man working at a Taco Bell? A young man freshly out of high-school, who could not get into college because his family is sadly struck with poverty. He also has a baby on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection when having relations with his girlfriend while he was intoxicated. I wish him the best of luck!

Q: Why couldn't the man get laid? A: Women were afraid of his 7 testes and 4 penises.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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