A light bulb is very similar in shape to a pear. So, when you change a light bulb, don't replace it by a pear.

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did you stub your toe?

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There was a white kid named Tyrone.

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Why was the man upset? His entire family was murdered, skinned, separated into assorted body parts, and stapled to trees.

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Carol never wore her safety goggles. Neither did Hellen Keller.

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Knock knock! I'm in the shower, i'll be there in 5 minutes

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Why did the police arrest the Escalade full of black men? Reckless driving. I lied, it was an asian woman.

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Oh wow, I've never seen one that big before. Thats what the 12 year old boy said as he starred at the the Great Pyramid of Pharaoh Khufu.

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Q: Who visits the dyslexic boy on christmas A: Satan

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What do you call a black man with gold teeth? Cruchie.

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Why did you step on my watermelon?

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What did the penguin say to the fisherman? Nothing, they are different animals, and thus, unable to communicate.

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Why doesn't the little boy talk to his mom? Because she smells like barbecue sauce.

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What's black and white and roams the sea floor? A zebra.

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How do you make something disappear from your hand? Throw it somewhere that's out of sight,

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Jane asked her husband why he was crying, he replied "Because i have extremely agressive cancer" hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.....Cancer

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knock, knock... no one replies and it becomes obvious that no one is in the house.

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how many black people does it take to complete the simplest task such as washing their own hair? A shitload! thats why slavery was so populer back in the day. (and gays were big then to because they had to shower together to remember to wash their hair.)

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Slam! Slam! Slam! I'm a woodpecker. Slam! Slam! Slam! Except with dirt.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7 because 7 is a escaped mental patient that thinks 6 betrayed him

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If Steve has 5 apples and gives Jenny 2, it is obvious they aren't eating oranges.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

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Why did the kid hide under the table? There was an earthquake.

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What do you call a horse standing alone in an empty field? Tesco's own Beef Lasagne.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops