There's a skunk and a lawyer standing on the side of the road, what's the difference? There are tire marks infront of the skunk.

A Muslim, a Buddhist, and a Christian are on a plain. They have to jump off for some reason. The Muslim straps a bomb to his chest, jumps out of the plain, and screams "AHLA AKBAH"!!!! The Buddhist jumps out and says save me heavenly Buddha. A giant golden hand catches him and lightly places him on land. The Christian says "aw hell with this" and jumps out, then says "save me heavenly Buddha". The giant golden hand places him down gently on land. The Christian then says "thank god". The giant golden hand comes back down and kills him.

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

Q: What's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

Why did the chicken cross the road? His sons funeral was on the other side.

What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? 'Where's my tractor?'

what do you call it when everyone becomes tolerant about gender identity. whatever pronoun it prefers.

Somebody stole my goat, now I can't enter it in the fair

XD, Okay, but you gotta marry me too XD Its working again I am skipping class tonight, how about you come by uh, the day after tomorrow? And bring condoms I don't have any.

Your mother is so fat, she developed diabetes and was rushed to hospital. She might not make it.

Why did the kid throw a clock out the window? The kid was probably having a temper tantrum and it was an expression of frustration.

What's similar between a black man and jelly babies? Nothing

what do you get when you cross a jellyfish, a jar, and a brown crayon? i dont know, im not into genetics, and jars dont have genes.

who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Osama Bin Laden

The Holocaust

A black man and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? Nobody, the car is parked while they look at a map for directions because doing that while you are driving would be very dangerous and could result in a collision.

Knock Knock Who's there? John John who? John Williams.

Q: What happens when the Hydro goes out? A: The Hydro goes out.

What did Little Jimmie say to his mom when he got home frome school? Nothing his moms dead.

What's worse than finding a dead fly in your soup? Finding your soup in a dead fly

Q:What the difference between a piano and a guitar A: Nothing, there both instruments and i lied about the difference

What do you call a woman on a bike? A dike

what did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? AIDs then he got mugged on the way home from the hospital

Your face

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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